I have some friends who recently moved to a new area, and they were attending a church for a few weeks. They enjoyed corporate worship, so they took their next step and decided to join a group. The next Sunday they looked at the options, found one that seemed like a good fit and away they went. After the coffee, donuts and introductions, this was the first question asked: “If you voted democrat in the last election, would you please raise your hand?”
Yes, this is an actual question that was recently asked in a Sunday morning group at a local church.
Needless to say, they never returned to that group.
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This example of a real and recent experience in a church group setting is more common than most pastors or ministry leaders would expect. No matter what you call your group ministry: Sunday school, small groups or life groups, they all have something in common. Each group needs a leader and the quality of the group is dependent on the quality of the leader.
So what happens when you realize you have a difficult leader on your hands in your group ministry?
Redirect
This is the best case scenario. This is the home run. The touch down. The goal.
Sometimes leaders simply need a little redirection. Leaders make mistakes and can do so without realizing it. Maybe the lesson went off the rails that week. They forgot to get a sub when they were going to be on vacation. Lesson preparation seems to be lacking.
Depending on the leader and your relationship with them, redirecting back to the mission and vision of their group could be all that is needed. Ask them how you can help and be prepared to encourage and equip them as you can. This can also be a good time to see if anything disruptive is going on in their life. You might find opportunity to minister to them as they minister to others. Lastly, remind them you are there to help them carry out their role as a leader to guide others as they walk with Jesus together.
Rehome
“Rehoming” leaders helps place them in the area they can thrive. Instead of dismissing their passions that don’t work with group ministry, direct them to places to put their passions to work.
The passionate teacher might be given short term studies to teach during another discipleship environment at the church. The passionate servant shifts to lead a ministry team to see the needs of the church or community. The passionate community organizer leads in hospitality and assimilation ministry.
Group leaders can be really passionate. This passion can come out in a group ministry in a variety of ways. A passion to teach, a passion to serve, or a passion for community. However, at times a group ministry can be captured by a leaders passion.
If your group’s aim is to foster discussion over God’s Word and application, the teaching passion might create a sermon in the group before the pastor’s sermon in worship.
A passion to serve can be a great element in a group, but if your leader says yes to every service opportunity in the church, they will lack the margin to prepare and care for their groups members consistently.
Every group should be a place that fosters relationships in community, but if God’s Word is never taught and discussed, then you have a foundational element missing.
Finding a new home for these leaders could serve the leaders and the group well in the long run.
Remove
If redirecting is best case scenario, removal is worst case scenario. This direction is hard because of the tension ministry leaders must walk. They will have to ask themselves, “will the removal of this leader cause more damage to the group than the leader is currently causing?”
A few reason to remove a leader could be:
- Willful teaching of false doctrine
- Using the group for times of slander and gossip
- Developing the group to sow disunity
When these elements are present in the life of a group, I have seen the group slowly lose members week after week until no group is left. But there are times when this is not the case. After an appeal to redirect or rehome does not work, removing a leader from group leadership is the best way forward. Short term, this direction feels like a lose-lose situation, but in the long term it can protect the church from false doctrine and dividing disunity.
Leading group leaders is hard work but worthy work. Group ministry is the second most attended discipleship environment in a church, just after corporate worship. Investing, equipping and encouraging your group leaders ensures discipleship is taking place in your group ministry.
EDITOR’S NOTE — This story was written by Andrew Harper and originally published by The Baptist Record.
