First person: Confessions of a recovering soccer dad

I’m still in a little bit of denial. I can’t believe it is over. Our now 18-year-old daughter Laura recently played her last competitive soccer game of the year — probably ever. The 2-1 victory over an Indiana team on a dreary, cold and rainy Saturday morning wasn’t a very eventful game, but it definitely signaled the end of an era.

Since she was a 3-year-old in pigtails, Laura has been kicking a soccer ball. Rec league, travel ball, middle and high school teams — she’s played for all of them.

Scan through our family’s Facebook pages and you’ll find them loaded with soccer memories — playing this tournament, that high school game, winning a state high school championship. On and on it goes.

Laura received a few offers to play at the college level, but she ultimately felt the Lord leading her to hang up her soccer cleats. This fall, she will begin her college journey with a focus on marketing — and Stephanie and I couldn’t be prouder of the smart, beautiful and talented young woman she’s become.

Lessons learned

I picked up a few parenting lessons — on and off the soccer field — along the way:

Every season of life is an opportunity for ministry. I pray other Christian parents will do better at seizing these opportunities than we did. As a Sunday School teacher and active member of our church, I have to admit I’ve had a love-hate relationship with soccer through the years.

I’ve complained — a lot — about the expense, the time investment and how it ate into many Sundays. But years ago, a friend gave me some helpful advice. While in the middle of one of my soccer rants, he suggested shifting my perspective to more of a ministry mindset.

That advice made an impression on me. I realized how I needed to focus on being a better friend and Christian example to my “soccer family” and to live out my faith wherever my feet are planted. Which leads me to the next lesson.

Living out our faith has to go beyond Sundays. No matter which sport or activity your kiddo decides to participate in, inevitably at some point families will have to make a choice.

Are you going to miss church — at least occasionally — when there is a scheduling conflict or are you going to hold the line no matter what? While our family tried to avoid missing church as much as possible, I admit we were out of town more Sundays than I care to discuss. Naturally, there are some strong opinions about this.

Making Sundays different

For us, it came down to striving to make Sundays different whether we were out of town or in the pew. Our family knew on Sundays we’d either be at church, watching the service together online, or working through a devotional reading.

No matter how well Christians navigate this challenge, we need to live out our faith in front of our kids ALL week long. My pastor shared one Sunday that the best weapon in a parent’s arsenal is when their words line up with their actions. That is something we must continually fight to do.

Enjoy those rare family moments together. Through the years, we were able to turn a lot of our soccer trips into mini vacations — whether at tournaments in the Southeast, Midwest or at games in Florida, Colorado and California.

While not all the players and parents in our soccer family are active in church, we spent a lot of time  — definitely a few tailgating events — with caring parents who love their kids and want the best for them.

We hope to continue to stay in touch with them in the years ahead. Our daughter has also made some great friendships. And if any of them decide to visit our church or Sunday School classes, we’ll have the tailgate food ready.