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Rashional Thoughts: Survivors of sexual abuse share how they see their advocacy roles

  • September 25, 2021
  • Jennifer Davis Rash
  • Editorials by Jennifer Rash, Featured, Latest News, Ohio, Rashional Thoughts, Tennessee

Rashional Thoughts: Survivors of sexual abuse share how they see their advocacy roles

So how many of you found yourselves looking up “indemnification” and “fiduciary responsibility” during the Sept. 20–21 Southern Baptist Convention Executive Committee meeting (see story here) or after the meeting as people were discussing it?

I’ve read the definitions multiple times and also added “attorney-client privilege” to the list, just to make sure I was clear on it as well.

It’s amazing what we can learn in these crash course situations, but how sad that in this case it has to do with people’s lives.

When EC chairman Rolland Slade welcomed the survivors of sexual abuse who were present at the meeting, they received a standing ovation.

“We are praying for you and thank you for being understanding and patient with us as we do our best to glorify God and protect you,” he said to them from the podium.

The next day he tweeted: “The heroines of the last two days at our SBC EC meeting were the SA survivors who sat voiceless in the gallery. Saw you, want you to know you matter and are loved. May GOD continually bless, comfort and keep you in the hollow of HIS hands.”

Survivors indicated their goal for attending the meeting was to make sure the EC members could see them as real people with real hurts.

Among those present was Hannah Kate Williams, who stood beside Tennessee pastor Grant Gaines in June as he proposed the motion that led to the current debate about attorney-client privilege.

Williams said, “I hope my presence speaks to the fact that while some of these people have hurt me, I am their family. We are the family of God, and we don’t get to abandon each other when it gets hard.

“I hope my presence here casts for them the vision I see — all held accountable at the foot of the cross but also our eternity of all being fully reconciled to Christ and each other at the table of the King.”

‘Standing up for us’

Jessica Alldredge of First Baptist Church Oregon, Ohio, said she was “overwhelmed when they recognized us.”

“We are frequently ignored or belittled, and it was a surprise to be acknowledged.

“I was also struck by the number of people who thanked us for coming. Some even had tears in their eyes while telling us they were working hard on our behalf to make things right. There are good people standing up for us in the process and that should be recognized.”

Tiffany Thigpen also attended the meeting. “I’m glad I went. I felt it was important for there to be a presence by more than just the Committee members.

“I felt that having a survivor in the room might bring extra clarity to the need for this decision, as I knew waiving privilege would be a major sticking point.

“I didn’t hold much hope that there would be a unilateral passing vote,” Thigpen said.

“Micah 6:8 is my continued hope for the leaders and pastors in regards to this crisis of sexual abuse in our churches.

“I’d like to remind [the SBC leaders] that we are the Church, each of us,” she noted. “If the whole institution were to crumble or the finances were to stop pouring in, if they lost their ‘jobs’ — what would be left is still the Church because it is us!”

As Thigpen listened to the discussion taking place during the Executive Committee meeting, she said she believed the wrong questions were asked.

“They have the wrong concerns. But this isn’t new to us. You’re all just getting to witness what we’ve seen over and over.”

Questions to ponder

The questions Thigpen says should be asked are:

“How can we provide the transparency that is needed for an investigation into what has happened (and not happened) and how do we cooperate?

“What are the best ways to support changes so there aren’t more victims? How do we make sure this is properly funded to get to the truth?

“How can we best help survivors and assure changes will take place?

“How do we follow Micah 6:8 in all of this?

“How do we accomplish what is asked versus ‘here’s all the reasons we can’t or shouldn’t?’”

Along with listening to how the experience made them feel, I also learned survivors each have varying levels of trauma and are in different stages of healing.

Each survivor deals with the trauma differently. The words we say or the way we treat her or him can trigger hurt and pain, but genuine love and concern also makes a positive impact.

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